Передача юмора в процессе перевода

accelerator," she cried out.However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."

8. A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!""Is this her first child?" the doctor queries."No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
9. A woman got on a bus holding a baby.The bus driver said, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus.The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong."The bus driver insulted me," she fumed.The man sympathized and said, "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers.""You're right," she said. "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind.""That's a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey."
10. Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first one said, "I hear sirens. Jump!"The second one said, "But we're on the 13th floor!"The first one screamed back, "This is no time to be superstitious."
11. Little Susan was mother's helper. She helped to set the table when company was due for dinner. Presently everything was on, the guest came in, and everyone sat down. Then mother noticed something was missing."Susan," she said, "You didn't put a knife and fork at Mr. Smith's place.""I thought he wouldn't need them," explained Susan. "Daddy says he always eats like a horse!"
12. It was three o'clock in the morning, and the receptionist at a posh hotel was just dozing off, when a little old lady came running towards her, screaming. "Please come quickly!" she yelled, "I just saw a naked man outside my window!!!" The receptionist immediately rushed up to the old lady's room."Where is he?" asked the receptionist."He's over there," replied the little old lady, pointing to an apartment building opposite the hotel. The receptionist looked over and could see a man with no shirt on, moving around his apartment."It's probably a man who's getting ready to go to bed," she said reassuringly. "And how do you know he's naked, you can only see him from the waist up?""The dresser, honey!" screamed the old lady. "Try standing on the dresser!"
13. A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down ‘cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour.Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn't throw out the pest."Oh, I really don't care or mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."
14. A man visits his aunt in the nursing home. It turns out that she is taking a nap, so he just sits down in a chair in her room, flips through a few magazines, and munches on some peanuts sitting in a bowl on the table.Eventually, the aunt wakes up, and her nephew realizes he's absentmindedly finished the entire bowl. "I'm so sorry, auntie, I've eaten all of your peanuts!""That's okay, dearie," the aunt replied. "After I've sucked the chocolate off, I don't care for them anyway."